Fortune
So I had to feed my addiction last nite for fortune cookie fortunes by ordering delicious chinese delivery yet again...
Fortune Cookie Say:
"You will travel far and wide, both pleasure and business. :)"
Ok, that's cool...my gigs kinda require that. But I have had a recent change in circumstances that I figured would put an end to that...but I totally believe my fortunes from this chinese eatery, they have all been correct, so I'm pretty happy about this one. Plus, the Sagittarius animal in me hates to be in one place for too long, I'm far too fickle/get bored too easily for any of that shite. It's all about the whole gypsy vibe. New places, new adventures, new whatever.
So whats up with the whole settling down thing I was doing with blondie? So contentedly, at that? I mean, I was pretty cool about getting into a little routine with him. I actually found that I loved it. So predictable and safe. I must admit that I do not feel very safe in my life because of all of the travel I did alone, as well as other circumstances. Indie, to be sure, but not safe. So settling down in my life with blondie was such a sweet change. I often thought we were even kinda like the cute old couple in the diamond commercials...but young and hip...lol. It was adorable. Never had that before. It was new, but so mature and old...and I totally dug that.
But it looks like, according to my fortune, that my life will go back to the textbook Sagittarius lifestyle...lots of travel. Plus it will be for "pleasure and business". Right on. I can deal with that again. I just need to maybe get my shit together and hire an assistant or something so I won't have to travel alone all the time. That would rule.
(Oh my hell! That post almost sounded like maybe I'm finally getting on with my life already. Yay me!! Wonder how long this will last?)
And ohhhh, guess blondie didn't block me from IM like I thought...he logged on last nite and, of course I wigged. Didn't expect to see him on my list again. Thank gawd I was talking to a couple of people at the time cuz I prolly would have impulsively said hi to him...and I know I need to just leave it. Close call.
Songs on shuffle:
I Want You -- Tom Waits
I Started Something I Couldn't Finish -- The Smiths
Windowpane -- Opeth
Obscured -- Smashing Pumpkins
Run Down the Stairs -- Beat Happening
Santeria -- Sublime
Know Your Onion! -- The Shins
Gathering Darkness -- Grade
Fortune Cookie Say:
"You will travel far and wide, both pleasure and business. :)"
Ok, that's cool...my gigs kinda require that. But I have had a recent change in circumstances that I figured would put an end to that...but I totally believe my fortunes from this chinese eatery, they have all been correct, so I'm pretty happy about this one. Plus, the Sagittarius animal in me hates to be in one place for too long, I'm far too fickle/get bored too easily for any of that shite. It's all about the whole gypsy vibe. New places, new adventures, new whatever.
So whats up with the whole settling down thing I was doing with blondie? So contentedly, at that? I mean, I was pretty cool about getting into a little routine with him. I actually found that I loved it. So predictable and safe. I must admit that I do not feel very safe in my life because of all of the travel I did alone, as well as other circumstances. Indie, to be sure, but not safe. So settling down in my life with blondie was such a sweet change. I often thought we were even kinda like the cute old couple in the diamond commercials...but young and hip...lol. It was adorable. Never had that before. It was new, but so mature and old...and I totally dug that.
But it looks like, according to my fortune, that my life will go back to the textbook Sagittarius lifestyle...lots of travel. Plus it will be for "pleasure and business". Right on. I can deal with that again. I just need to maybe get my shit together and hire an assistant or something so I won't have to travel alone all the time. That would rule.
(Oh my hell! That post almost sounded like maybe I'm finally getting on with my life already. Yay me!! Wonder how long this will last?)
And ohhhh, guess blondie didn't block me from IM like I thought...he logged on last nite and, of course I wigged. Didn't expect to see him on my list again. Thank gawd I was talking to a couple of people at the time cuz I prolly would have impulsively said hi to him...and I know I need to just leave it. Close call.
Songs on shuffle:
I Want You -- Tom Waits
I Started Something I Couldn't Finish -- The Smiths
Windowpane -- Opeth
Obscured -- Smashing Pumpkins
Run Down the Stairs -- Beat Happening
Santeria -- Sublime
Know Your Onion! -- The Shins
Gathering Darkness -- Grade
posted by Jenn at 10:23:00 AM
3 Comments:
hey there mike!
yeah, sometimes stalker mode just sneaks up on me before i realize that i'm really looking for more information than i really need if i expect to keep some sense of sanity...so i really watch myself now so i don't drift into stalker mode if i'm at places we used to both go to online.
the whole thing with stalker mode for me is that i have actually had a couple of real stalkers...and it's pretty scary. people who you think are normal dig and dig and just follow your every move and just make a person feel invaded. so i imagine that is how blondie would feel (certainly to a far lesser extent tho), if he found out i had ever stalked him...so i caught myself, and i totally stay far away from that anymore.
but it's gotta be hard when you find your ex's stuff in your house....be strong. don't go there. like i had said, i'm the worst example of how to get over a breakup, but i totally believe that it only hurts to find out xtra info about the ex that isn't really necessary.
my 2c.
your story of disaster definitely helped me out, as they all have. it's totally a universal thing to go thru a shitty breakup, and everyone deals with it differently...wish i had the magic pill to make the pain go away cuz god knows i'm driving my friends batty with my endless tears...but i know they'll stop someday and i'll be ok. and you will to.
Hi~ I wish I could turn my stalker mode off. =( I keep visiting his web site even though nothing changes. And then I get mad at myself for being weak.
Sounds like you're getting strong, Jenn! Way to go!
hey pinkbunny!
dont beat yourself up...we've all admitted that we stalk our ex's a little bit...but the only reason i've stopped is cuz it's not helping me deal with the breakup. so i guess right now, you just gotta get real selfish and only think about what's gonna be good for you. i've read your blog, and you seem like an amazing person...so focus on whats gonna help you keep growing that way. and yeah, IMO that includes somehow gaining that crazy ability not to care about him anymore...and i think not stalking is a big help with that...especially when you have a class with him. you need as little as possible to remind you of him.
i still think i will never find anyone i will ever love again...blondie was The One for me...but that doesn't mean that I don't wanna be hot shit. so that's kinda what i think you should do...just focus on making yourself even more amazing/hot/brilliant, whether you eventually get back together with your ex or not.
hang in there pb...i know you will come thru this better than you were when it started. we're all behind ya.
and holy cow! seriously i can't believe i'm so clear on this today...i guess after all this time, everything my friends have tried to pound into my head is finally sinking in...lol
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